Baby, I'm a wanderer

Times have changed. I used to be on you now I'm over you. But even now you hold a special place in my heart. One no one can ever take away from you. My first love, my first real love. And also the only person I've ever loved. Guess a part of me will always be crazy about you. Controlling the itch on my fingers to touch you whenever we cross paths. You'll have to settle for the smile tugged between my lips in the far corner of my mouth. A ghost of the giant one that would escape me every time my eyes would find you, rebelliously breaking free from my otherwise string of consciously calculated movements. Powerful, such that even when I tried I could never properly repress it. It was my dead giveaway. My body saying I love you without any words or consent necessary. And you knew it. Knew that as long as I held that smile you would be holding of my heart. This other smile though, it's simply a tiny homage to the good memories and the warmth you once made me feel inside. It's not an "hello" or a "goodbye" just a "I'll see you around".

"Change is inevitable

Why hold on to what you have to let go of?

(...)

Loving you was nice

But it's a new day, a new season

I've been sad inside

And he could see it, picked up your pieces

(...)

Shame on me for changing

No, No, No,

Shame on you for staying the same"

- in "Spotless Mind" by Jhené Aiko

Exams II

24 th

Merry Christmas T

Equality

Forget them. They've never walked in our shoes. Never felt different like the way we were born. It was never a conscious choice of ours. So how are we to blame? We just wanna love and be loved. Just like everybody else. But they couldn't feel love the way we do. And judge us for it. Make us feel wrong for it. Like misfits, sickened souls, improper, unworthy to be their equals. No one is entitled to be unique, nobody else may be different. Otherwise you're defying what they deem correct. And you become the enemy. The disgust in their faces, the unforgiving look in their eyes, the venom in their words. No longer accepted, in dire need of a cure. Even if you're not sick... They just don't seem to understand.

Life is a marathon

When the tears fall, let them go. Don't wipe them off your face. May they serve as the reminder of your mistakes. The proof of your sorrow. The honesty no words can carry. The pain burning through your soul. Pure raw emotion... And when they dry, they'll be gone. They'll fade away just like what caused them. One day that is. You just got to live through it... Until then, time is of the essence, time is the only compass you'll need. For only time knows where we're headed.

7th Circle, 2nd Ring

Surrounded, engulfed by the nothingness all around. That lingers like a mist of uncertainty in the air otherwise heavy with sulfur. No doubt charged with enough self destructive power to erase us from existence. And that's precisely the point. Upon falling to the deep deep depths of a hollow heart, there she was. Bleeding from the wounds that were no longer hers to claim. But belonging to a body she lost rights over. For she sought freedom from it. Slicing through the rope that was her only guide home. And now there she rests, eternal in defeat to suffer for what was lost. Which she took willingly therefore enticing her own demise. Condemned to pay until after the end of time. They shall feast upon you, and powerless to fight, only the feeling will remain. Cry, scream, writhe in agony. Feed us your delicious desperation while they step all over you, while you're broken to pieces. Steadfast, unmoving, never losing sight of your one mistake. Regret being the lone companion to pain.